I Miss My Kinder Self

Yes. I know I am kinder years ago as compared to now. It may be because of some frustrations I experienced as an adult that led me to being less kind. But I miss the kind me. I know it is still there, waiting to be unlocked again. The struggle is real though. But I still try by doing mostly these:

  1. Everyday, I remind myself to be kind. I remind myself that being kind to EVERYONE is better than being nasty.
  2. When I get frustrated, I excuse myself for a quick bio break. The walk to and from the restroom helps a bit in calming me down.
  3. When I know I would not be kind during a discussion or a meeting, especially the unscheduled ones, I request that we talk after 10 or 15 minutes. This gives me enough time to collect and remind myself to just keep calm.
  4. I ask God to intervene. Not ask actually. I plead Him to intervene.
  5. When my thoughts go towards the negative, I force myself to stop thinking negatively and again remind myself to be kind.
  6. I think of all my blessings and automatically, I feel grateful for everything, even the things that I know I don’t deserve but was still given to me.

It is hard to be kind. It is one of my daily battles. Or maybe it is actually easy. It is just hard to practice it all the time especially on unfavorable circumstances. But we must still always try to practice kindness.

A to Z Survey

Saw this survey from an acquaintance’s FB post. I am answering it just for fun hehehe.

A: age – 37

B: biggest fear – snakes (iiiwwww…even just the plastic toys I don’t want to touch those)

C: current time – 11:05 PM

D: drink you had last – water

E: easiest person to talk to – my HS BFF

F: favourite song – right now? This Is The Day by Scott Wesley Brown hehehe

G: grossest memory – my memory is failing me right now.

H: hometown – Baguio

I: in love with – myself :p

J: jealous of – those who can easily, sweetly, and calmly negotiate with people to get what they want.

K: kindest person you know – my mom

L: longest relationship – life long friends would be 30 years, current BF-GF is 1.5 years and hopefully more.

M: middle name – Botangen

N: number of siblings – 5

O: one wish – for a progressive Philippines that can be felt by all Filipinos

P: person you spoke on the phone to last – my brother

Q: questions you’re always asked – “When are you getting married?”

R: reasons to smile – amazing family, supportive friends, existing lovelife hahaha

S: song you sang last – This is the day by Scott Wesley Brown. I just discovered this few hours ago in my playlist and was able to really listen to it and I liked it so I searched for the lyrics and sang (or rather whispered) along while it was playing.

T: time you woke up – 6:45 AM

U: underwear colour – neon pink—joke :p

V: vacation destination – Vatican City

W: worst habit – wasting my time by playing games or aimless
web browsing

X: x-rays you’ve had – chest

Y: your favourite food – at the moment, trail mix. My savior
when food at the concessionaire is blah or can’t even take a
break because of work

Z: zodiac sign – Aries

How Can They Do That?

Cu-current events lang ako dahil may hugot ako.

Few times in the past, I have read about the plight of workers of Hacienda Luisita. These workers were recruited from far-flung regions and were promised fair wages and a generally
better opportunity but experienced the opposite. Those promises were not followed. The worst that I read today was that they are locked up so that they cannot leave the premises. What the heck was that?!

This hurts me because my parent’s livelihood was tending to our small garden. And gardening is no joke. Totoo yung magtanim ay di biro. You start work before daybreak. You end work past dinner time with no overtime pay. No day off even. When I was young, we were required to help in the garden after classes and on Saturdays and Sundays. The only chance we get to study is at night after garden work is done. If work extended, then study hours will be delayed. Several times especially during the summer, we work as late as 8 or 9 PM just to finish watering the plants because we just borrowed the water from the neighbor who has more money to buy longer hose so that he can position his water source kilometers away from their property. We are lucky if there is full moon because we have instant light, but if there’s none, then we’d have to make do with flashlights. Or a lighted fire pitch/torch if the flashlight ran out of battery.

If there’s harvest, you need to pack until you’re done even if it means until late night because the harvest needs to be picked up early the next morning to be brought to the market. A few minutes late from schedule means you’ll be stuck in traffic and all the lowland buyers would be gone and you won’t be able to dispose your harvest until the next day where by that time, the quality has already declined, hence you have to sell it at a cheaper price.

We do all these works as a family because money was hard and hiring help was expensive. But on the rare times that our parents hired some help for specific tasks, they did not haggle. We paid them with the onging wage rates at that time. We did not shortchange them. Because doing so would mean depriving their families of a decent meal or worse, the opportunity to send their kids to school.

And today, I saw a post by the assistant secretary of DSWD about the Hacienda Luisita workers who were able to escape the farm and somehow foudn their way to DSWD. Darn!!! Their WEEKLY wages was even less than the daily wage we paid in the ’90s. If this is a joke, it’s not funny. WHY can’t you not fairly pay your workers? Is that too much to do? I’m sure their wages won’t have a massive effect on your overall net worth. Why be so selfish? I don’t understand. This is seriously disturbing.

One item in my bucket list is to be able to put up an agriculture-related business and while my main goal is to make it stable enough to support my family, the other side of the coin is that I want to provide job opportunities even to just a few people.

Sana ako rin may-ari ng ekta-ektaryang lupain. Sana ako rin maraming perang pwedendg ipamuhunan para mabigyan ng trabaho ang iba kahit mangilan-ngilan lang sila. Sana.

Hay. Unayen aya.

pinepitch

Pine torch. Source

The Power of the Selfie Stick

I bought a selfie stick to be used at home, and in anticipation of our trip over the holidays.

This was what my phone contained on the day I and my nieces started using it. That little lady in red dominated my phone and the selfie stick. My phone was filled with her photos and videos. I’m not complaining though. At least as early as now, I already have some things to blackmail her for when she becomes hard-headed when she grows older hahaha!

selfie1

selfie3 selfie4 selfie5

Thank You, Dear Lord

Dear Lord,

Thank you for all the blessings in 2016, most especially for keeping me in your tight embrace during those times that I was frustrated, angry, tired, impatient, uninspired, ungrateful and doubtful of Your plans for me.

Thank you for all the blessings that You will give me in 2017 no matter how undeserving I am. I know that You know my heart’s desires. I’m claiming that You will grant them all in Your perfect time.

Guide me so that all that I do will be for Your glory. All for you, Lord. Amen.

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